Opinions

     I am a very opinionated person.  I don't know if people near me know this or not.  Maybe my closer friends, but definitely not just the students in my classes.  I don't know why, and I have seemed to have this problem before, but I find myself hiding myself more and more.  I never give people my opinions.  I feel like my opinions, in general, sway from what most of the people in my town think.  They are entitled to their opinions and I'm entitled by mine, but I feel like I would get a bad reaction if I just went around saying what I think.  I am very liberal, especially compared to all of the very conservative people in my town.  Even the democrats aren't even close to my levels of liberal in this town.  Now, I don't think I'm better than them by any means, but I feel as though they would be upset as to my viewpoints.  I am very passionate and loyal to my opinions and will back them if necessary, but I won't normally tell people my opinions if they don't ask.  I know people don't want to hear my opinions all the time, but I still feel like they should be heard sometimes, and I'm not exactly sure as to how to go about doing that.  I'm bad at talking and I get very nervous and shaky when I have to do or say anything in front of people.  If I have to read a sheet of paper, I can do that, but if I have to talk about why I think gender binaries are stupid, I get really tight and my heart starts beating too fast.  I worry what people think of the inside me.  I can agree with others opinions if they're mine, but I can't usually just speak up for my opinion on my own.  This is a problem.

Do you have any anxieties like this?

Failed...

Yes, I failed my "resolution" on the second day.  That's not because I wasn't trying, but I'm working on a larger project and I was spending my time on that project.  But oh well, I try not to think too much about these kinds of things.  You know, live in the moment.  I want to do things, but not force myself to.  Last year I sort of made myself miserable forcing myself to create things.  This year I will create will I feel the inspiration to.  I want to open up myself to people more also.  I really want to try with this one.  I felt a sad sort of nostalgia missing things I never had, like deep human interaction.  I don't think people know me as much as I'd like them to.  Maybe, I could read a self-help book on it.  I hope you're resolutions are going well!

What was your resolution/s?

Darren Criss

Today I decided to start a 365 project.  Mine is going to be people.  365 people, whether they're drawn, created, celebrities, friends, family, whatever... there is going to be 365 of them.  Today is Darren Criss.  I drew him completely with pencil.  It took about two hours.